Have you ever noticed how tough it is to make decisions when we attach money consequences to them? The entire decision-making process gets clouded by the money. Instead of analyzing a nice long list of pros and cons, we end up with just one factor – money. And so, the ultimate decision comes down to money and we forget the really important things to consider – family, friends, time, beliefs, non-monetary values, and so on.

For me, and a lot of others, we lose sight of these other considerations because of fear – the fear of not having enough. Just the thought of decreased earnings, savings, investments or things, instills fear and we are paralyzed. Sometimes we’re not even aware of the fear and even if we are, we don’t really know why. Is this fear growing in the pit of our stomach because of today’s circumstance? Or, is it a learned reaction to past experiences – either our own or experiences of others, like our parents, our society, our media?

The way I deal with this is to begin by quantifying the fear. Many of the individuals and couples I work with come in with huge fear and anxiety about where they think they are. But when we take the time to analyze the real numbers – quantify the fear – we discover it is not as big or as bad as they had imagined it to be. The money piece of the decision can be put to rest. 

Then we can ask ourselves, is this my fear or someone else’s? And, if it’s someone else’s, why am I letting it make decisions for me? It’s the first step to living a financially conscious life. It’s putting money in its place – behind all the important things in our lives – those real things no one can take away from us!

Instead of decisions, decisions, decisions – it should be quantify, quantify, quantify! Spoken like a true accountant.

This past week I had the pleasure of having a young poet stay with me while she attended USM’s Stonecoast Creative Writer’s Program at Wolfe’s Neck in Freeport.  After hours of intense work, she spoke to me of the many beautiful, creative writing pieces that were read by recent graduates of this MFA program.  It made me think about the place art has on our society’s list of valuable assets.  If we were to judge it by the proverbial, “put your money where your mouth is”, it isn’t very high on that list. In fact, society’s expectation is that art is not something you should expect to make money with and so we treat it like the poor stepchild. 

Historically, this seems to have been the norm because we hear artists, writers, musicians and actors described as starving.  Before creative souls even get started, our colloquialisms give them the expectation of being poor.  And, if they are lucky enough to be successful, they feel they have “sold-out” because they weren’t supposed to make money doing the creative work they love.  Or, if they do meet the low expectations we gave them, they feel “lesser than” because they chose to pursue a career in the creative arts.

Yet, most of us agree that the fine arts add endless depth and substance to our lives.  The creative works touch us and invoke feelings in places that we don’t easily or readily access.  I remember reading the book The Giver, one of my son’s 5^th grade novels, about a world with no color, no sound, no love – just sameness.  Quite frankly, it should have been labeled PG-13 for horror!

And, that is what our world would be without the arts.  So next time, you think of the starving creative souls and programs in our world, shift your beliefs just a bit to give them the value they deserve.  Maybe if we all shift a bit, someday we’ll hear everyone bragging, “my son, the artist!”

Add beauty to your life – support the arts!

Vacation is over and I’m sure you know what re-entry is like. Some many times, I have questioned whether vacation was really worth it? I find it especially hard to return after coming back from Robbinston where I’ve managed to get away from e-mail, internet and phone calls.  Life becomes much simpler and more manageable when we drift back into the way it was – or as Maine says, The Way Life Should Be! (If only all of Maine was like Washington County.)

When we’re away from it all, no matter where we choose to vacation, all our shoulds go away.  No more, “I should do this, you should do that or we shouldn’t even think of.”  We just live in the moment and make decisions based on what we want to do, not what we should do.  We know vacation is about relaxing and having fun so we just ease into life instead of facing our daily pile of shoulds.  Likewise, we’ve planned for the vacation financially so we needn’t struggle with financial worries – we have it all planned and we can just let everything flow.

So the questions to be answered are, how do we keep this feeling going when we get back?  How do we ease into life and do what comes naturally instead of listening to the interior voices of shoulds and musts?  How do we live a financially conscious life so we don’t get caught up in the financial problems so many of us face? 

As luck would have it, I was given a one-day reprieve because one by one all my Monday appointments cancelled or rescheduled and suddenly I had a free day. All my scheduled shoulds disappeared and because I am still in vacation mode I stayed easy and relaxed and some shoulds (like this one) turned into wants. 

Hmmm, is that the secret?  What do you think?

Have you ever had a secret that you thought you had shared – only to out it was only in your mind!  Well, it’s happened to me and I wonder what in my subconscious was keeping me from setting it free?  My e-mail announcing this blog never got sent.  So some of you may have since found it,  but while on vacation, I’m republishing for those who did not!

Although a few of you have known what I’ve been up to, I have kept most of you in the dark.  But now it’s official, I’m an author!  The Problem With Money? It’s Not About the Money! is hot off the press.  I began writing my book while on my annual Robbinston vacation last year.  And less than one short year later it is finished!  Finally, the two sides of my life (accounting and self-discovery) have come together.  I can’t wait to share what I have learned.

My professional work over the last 30 years made it clear to me that people’s issues with money couldn’t be solved with just left-brain solutions—I knew there was more to it.  But, it wasn’t until I became a Certified Empowerment Trainer that I found the right-brain tools for helping people really deal with finances.  The empowerment methodology taught me how deep-rooted beliefs can hold us hostage to patterns that don’t serve our lives and my left-brained experience as a CPA and Personal Financial Specialist  took me straight to money.  I had found the missing link and couldn’t wait to share this discovery with others. 

The Problem With Money? is about mastering the unexamined beliefs that drive our financial lives.  Because once we uncover and master these beliefs, we can have the money life we deserve. And once we have the financial life we deserve and want, we can put money where it belongs in our life.  Not as the most important, most powerful, or most feared thing in our life—but rather as just a small piece of our overall life.  Finally, money will be put in proper perspective.

Okay, now I’ve shared my secret – once and for all!  Pass it on……….  (Sorry you missed the party – my fault!)

I’ve promised myself while on my two week vacation that I would stay away from my computer and phone.  So, in keeping with this promise, I’m repeating my post from a year ago. 

I’ve been on a two week vacation in Robbinston, Maine, a very tiny town with no town center and only 500 or so people in almost 34 square miles.  Robbinston is in Washington County, Maine – Downeast Maine’s “Sunrise County.”  Washington County is called the Sunrise County because it is the easternmost county in the United States.   It’s also the poorest county in Maine and among the poorest in our country.  

However, it is only economically poor – its natural wealth is endless.  Watching the roaring waters of Reversing Falls I see seals riding the waves.  On the lake with the ethereal loons, I’m amazed as one swims under my kayak.   Hearing a splash on my morning walk, I see a majestic bald eagle rising from the lake with breakfast in his talons.  Wild strawberries abound in fields soon to make way for the blueberry carpets of August.  And as I walk along the country roads, I am greeted by the sight and smell of cedar and sea roses.    

Every day I am reminded of the tangible values in life. Things we can touch and feel and smell and see – things that are constant, things we can count on.  This is the currency of Washington County.  Washington County’s coffers are lined with raw beauty that feeds our souls not our pocketbooks.  After two weeks I know these are the things of true value, the things that remind us where real joy and wealth can be found.

Now the challenge is to remember Washington County’s values when I rejoin the “real world” – that electronic working world; that money world.  Each day back the memories will get dimmer, but I am forever connected to the loons, the eagles, the waters – how can I forget?  If we let them, they speak louder than the misguided values of our financial world.   Do you hear them?

Hope you enjoyed it again – I am!

I’ve been in San Francisco since Tuesday enjoying some time for myself while my step-daughter-in law attended a conference. What a wonderful city of diverse neighborhoods, amazing views – a walker’s dream come true. Easy to buy into the song lyrics, I Left My Heart in San Francisco.

But, last night in what was probably an ill-conceived notion to walk to an obscure performance on the other side of the city, we heard a different song. No amazing views, no interesting ethnic diversity, just streets populated with those less fortunate.  It brought me back to the reality of our society.  And for me, that reality is the real life gap between those that have and those that have not.

Financial decisions before, during and (after?) the economic downturn has caused this gap to widen. It’s so wide that it’s hard to see across this gap and even harder for us to look into the depth of this reality. But it’s important to stay aware of this dichotomy and to think about how our beliefs around money contribute to it.

Do our beliefs expand this gap or do they begin to bridge the gap? Do we see the less fortunate as a group, a group who doesn’t even try, a group whose only goal in life is to live off the system? Or, can we see them as individuals, individuals all with a different story—an individual story that brought them to this stage of life.

Because if we don’t see each person as an individual, it’s easy to dehumanize them and look away. It’s easy to brush them into city neighborhoods without amazing views and interesting attractions and forget about them. Thank you San Francisco for reminding me that each one deserves much more from me.  I think I found  my heart in San Francisco!

Home on the red-eye tonight – tomorrow will be ugly!

Although a few of you have known what I’ve been up to, I have kept most of you in the dark.  But now it’s official, I’m an author!  The Problem With Money? It’s Not About the Money! is hot off the press.  I began writing my book while on my annual Robbinston vacation last year.  And less than one short year later it is finished!  Finally, the two sides of my life (accounting and self-discovery) have come together.  I can’t wait to share what I have learned.

My professional work over the last 30 years made it clear to me that people’s issues with money couldn’t be solved with just left-brain solutions—I knew there was more to it.  But, it wasn’t until I became a Certified Empowerment Trainer that I found the right-brain tools for helping people really deal with finances.  The empowerment methodology taught me how deep-rooted beliefs can hold us hostage to patterns that don’t serve our lives and my left-brained experience as a CPA and Personal Financial Specialist  took me straight to money.  I had found the missing link and couldn’t wait to share this discovery with others. 

The Problem With Money? is about mastering the unexamined beliefs that drive our financial lives.  Because once we uncover and master these beliefs, we can have the money life we deserve. And once we have the financial life we deserve and want, we can put money where it belongs in our life.  Not as the most important, most powerful, or most feared thing in our life—but rather as just a small piece of our overall life.  Finally, money will be put in proper perspective.

So, join me tomorrow night (Thursday, June 10^th) from 5:30 – 7:00 at the Harbour’s Edge at 6 Custom House Wharf on the Portland waterfront to celebrate my new book and Joyce Broadwater becoming a new owner at Honeck-O’Toole.  And, if you can’t make it, visit my new website at  www.janehoneck.com to find out more.

Celebrate good times – come on!

Yesterday I was in Boston with my son at his annual cardiology appointment. It’s amazing how 3 years have passed since his open heart surgery and yet the same feelings of fear and anxiety pop up as soon as we start the drive to Tufts Medical Center. We both know it’s a routine visit but I notice that we are a little testier, a bit more quick to respond – and not necessarily in a bright and breezy manner. 

At least we are conscious of why we are feeling this way and what’s causing it. We know it’s a result of those two weeks of worry. Each year we’re able to acknowledge a little more of what we went through and we try to be a bit more patient with each other and ourselves. We know the feelings really don’t have much to do with now.

I wish it were that easy in the rest of our lives where prior experiences and/or beliefs hold us hostage to dysfunctional behaviors. Take money for example. How many times have you worried about spending too much, saving too little or something in between? Have you noticed fear, anxiety, disapproval, avoidance or any number of feelings and emotions?

And if you did notice, have you taken the time to figure why you feel them or where they come from? Unfortunately, if we don’t take the time to figure it out, we just keep doing the same thing over and over again not knowing why.  We stay stuck in the same old patterns.  But, when we’re stuck in those same old unconscious patterns – we can’t make any meaningful change in our financial life. We ignore our worries and anxieties and keep ourselves miserable on the same old merry-go-round. Do you know what I mean?

Another good check-up – no worries for another year!

What a glorious month of May (and all of spring for that matter). Here in Maine we’ve had unprecedented sunshine with days that emulated some of the best days of summers past. We were simply amazed when temperatures climbed to the 80’s and then stunned when 90’s brought out our summer wardrobes weeks earlier than usual. Unbelievably the best spring I can remember in a long time.

And yet, most of the comments I heard have been filled with worries. What does this warm weather mean? Will we have one of those horrible months of June like we’ve had in the past? Will the real summer disappear and not show up until mid July like last year? And, of course, is this what we have all been warned about?

It kind of reminds me of the worries that crop up when we receive a monetary windfall whether it’s a bill that’s smaller than expected, an unexpected gift of cash or, for those of us self-employed, a new client or source of revenue. We’re so ready for the other shoe to drop. It must have been a mistake. Or, this isn’t really enough to do anything with. And, this good luck is too good to be true and won’t really last!

Rather than being grateful in the moment for simple pleasures, we charge ahead (or lurk behind) to expectations of things falling apart. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we could be fully present to the gift of sunshine, warmth and/or financial freedom—even if it is only for a day or an hour or even just a minute?

Because after all, as Scarlett O’Hara said so well, “tomorrow is another day!” Worry can wait for a while; let’s bask in the glory of today.

Thanks and honor to all present and past day heroes. Have a wonderful Memorial Day.

I’ve been at a training session in Cape Cod since last Thursday. The training has been tremendous for honing my skills in money coaching individuals and couples.  But the best part has been staying with my 11 year-old granddaughter and experiencing  life on Cape Cod through her eyes.

Cape Cod has always been an enigma to me.  Being from the Midwest, I haven’t had a lot of time on the Cape and always saw it as an ostentatious place that I wasn’t much interested in.  But seeing it from my granddaughter’s viewpoint, I finally get it.  She has lived here most of her life and is living the life I wish so many of our children could. 

We’ve been on walks where she showed me her world and all its natural beauty – through woods, on edges of marshes, up high hills – all places that she loves and lives in every day.  Our trip to a local Truro beach didn’t result in the usual walk along the water’s edge.  Oh no, it was a carefully orchestrated walk around the dune grass, through the marsh to an inlet where we avoided crabs as we ventured across water sometimes deeper than we thought.  What an adventure for me – someone not very courageous with these things.

So, seeing Cape Cod through the eyes of my granddaughter, I see the currency of Cape Cod, not in the stunning homes or expensive tourist shops and restaurants, but rather through the natural, free beauty of the land and sea.  Things that are free and available to all of us – but,  only if we can find them among all the distractions of our world. 

Cape Cod during off season, makes it easier.  But what about those of us who find ourselves every day in the midst of overvalued and costly distractions – how do we remember?

I could use some help – what do you do?